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  • Rachel Jones

Gratitude

According to John Gottman, creator of Gottman Method Couples Therapy, there is a magic ratio for making love last. That ratio is 5:1 which means for every negative interaction in your relationship, you need 5 positive interactions. This often reminds me of when we were little kids and our teachers would make us say 2 positive things when we said one negative/mean thing to another kid. Who knew that teachers were teaching us a valuable relationship lesson with that?


One way I encourage couples to practice the 5:1 ratio is by implementing gratitude into their daily habits. It has been found that expressing gratitude regularly can change the structure of the brain and make us happier and healthier. I challenge couples to do this by naming three things they are grateful for in their relationship or about their partner daily for 21 days. It takes 21 days to form a habit and when you set this intention for those days it will become natural to do it often in your relationship.


There are many ways to go about this:

1.) Journal your gratitude at the beginning or end of the day for your partner.

2.) Share your gratitude for each other when you share a meal together.

3.) Make it a challenge and invite other couple friends to join you-you can do this through social media or by starting a text group.

4.) Put post-it-notes on the bathroom mirror or in your partner's car each day sharing your gratitude.


Mindfulness is key to implementing this into your life and relationship. You have to create a system that works for you to practice this daily!


Try it out and come share how this changes your relationship!


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  • Building Stronger Marriages

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